Somewhere along the Old Kent Road
Somewhere along the Old Kent Road
lives the man who stole my cat.
He didn’t mean to do it, he says.
But what does it matter
if that’s a fact?
I picked up a shovel and dug a grave,
put the litter tray inside, cursin’
the big bag of dried food remainin’.
Remember purring was the perk,
waking at five o’clock: scratchin’
to be let out.
The neighbour saw me diggin’,
called the RSPCA; in stormin’
like coppers with a zealot’s streak.
Six months probation for shovelin’
in a threatening manner, yer Honour please,
it was the fleas!